My Dad.



The roads are closed, the snow is falling

and all around friends are calling yoo-hoo… (I couldn’t resist)

I live in a winter wonderland and can’t help but wonder, how crazy it would be to live in a place like this without such an amazing community. More than just a little town (complete with it’s own fleet of snowplows) it’s a family.

So even though the roads are closed and I cannot foresee what I will do if I am stuck here for Christmas, I’m glad to be able to see the beauty of this storm, and glad to know that I will be okay even if I have to stay here.

— and come to think of it, that is also a metaphor for life.

Lonelily Bumpin along…

I’m currently sitting in Panera Bread, Fresno, CA (Picture below)

I have the day off today, and I’m in town taking care of a few errands and trying to enjoy life.

The thing is.. life right now is “interesting.”

I’m realizing more and more that I don’t fit here, and yet am called to be here.
I have to continually remind myself that we’re not called to be comfortable.
Recently, I’ve invested a lot of time into studying myself and my options; How do i work best, what gives me joy. I miss having structure in the workplace. I miss going to work and knowing “this is what I’m doing today” and “this is what it’s for” and if I don’t do it well “this will happen.” I feel purposeless at work. Like I’m just wasting my time and filling up space.

And on the other hand, I live in such an interesting community. I just realized that I don’t have friends here. I don’t have people to do things with. I don’t have a community. The thing is, people at camp spend time with other people like them. Families with families, couples with couples, singles with singles… Sure there are exceptions, but not on the whole. And beyond that, people spend time with people they work with, mainly because they are the only people you see. So what happens to the girl who is the only single person in the office? Lack of community. Don’t get me wrong.. this isn’t a “woe is me” or “I wish I weren’t single” post… just a look at camp and what it means to decide to serve here. Living here means choosing to be okay without friends or family. Living here means sacrifice. Acceptance is the first step to contentment, and I accept that I am not going to have friends this year.

I forgot!

I became so busy that I forgot I had a blog to update.
So much of nothing has happened in the past two weeks.

Alongside the nothing there have been a few highlights:
1. The Future of Forestry Concert in Bakersfield last Monday. (107 degrees in Bakersfield)
2. Coming in second in the HoeDown! and Square Dancing!
2. Watching “How I Met Your Mother”
3. Being Me.

In other news: This weekend I travel to Minnesota for the wedding of dear friends. Wedding Number 5 of the year. Crazyness.

And in 1 month my sister will be getting married. That finally became real last night. Unbelievable.